DISCLAIMER: What I am about to present to you will be unpleasant. Side effects may include migraine, shortness of breath, and suicidal thoughts… if you’re an editor, that is. Continue at your own risk.

What you are about to read is an actual cover letter submitted for a full-time job – a job in the company’s communications department. It’s not just bad; it could be mistaken for spam if it hadn’t arrived with a completed application and a résumé. Check it out:

Dear To Whom It May Concern:

This letter is to express my interest in the Special Event Coordinator position that you that is listed on your website. Based on my skills in Management and Human Resource I am confident that I would be a great addition to your team.

My resume that highlights my ability / knowledge/ expertise in Management is enclosed. During my past experienced on events am positive I can be a great access to your company. I can not wait to express my self to it’s fullness.

I am excited about the Special Event Coordinator position and the ability to help your our student succeed. Thanks you in advance for you time. Please do not hesitate to contact me if you have any questions. I would appreciate the opportunity to review my qualification in more detail.

[Name removed]

I’m going to assume you’ve never written something this bad and then asked the person you gave it to to hire you. Even if you aren’t trying to enter a communications position, having a spotless cover letter is essential.

Perhaps it was written by someone who wasn’t a native English speaker. Any cover letter I might write in another language would be much worse than this! But that’s all the more reason to make sure you get someone else to read over your letter.

Tips for a Better Cover Letter

As bad as this letter is, the writer did a few things right:

• Name the position you’re trying to get: It’s a good idea to let the reader know that you know what you’re applying for. Unfortunately, there’s no other evidence that this writer read the job description at all.
• Confidence: You have to know you’re the best candidate for the job, and that confidence has to come across in your letter. Unfortunately, this writer offers no support about why s/he would be “a great addition to your team.” Don’t rely solely on your résumé to explain why you should get the job.
• Tell the hiring manager you want the job: Always include a call to action. Ask for the interview. Let them know you’re serious about this job and not just wasting their time. Unfortunately, this entire letter wastes the reader’s time. But it did provide a good laugh!

The bad far outweighs the good here, but this letter highlights so many things not to do, it’s hard not to learn something from it.

Or maybe it was spam after all. At least it made me laugh. Can’t make this stuff up.

What’s the one thing you always include in a cover letter?